Fiat Lux

The light shines in the darkness,
and the darkness has not overcome it.

As I look forward to the beginning of my second year in college what with dance auditions just waiting across the corner, I think it’s important to remind myself of why I find dance so appealing as an art and avenue for creative expression.

Let this video be a reminder to myself of one of the two sets I was involved in last year that actually had a story to tell.

Improvement in different styles of dance and choreo can always come from attending optional workshops this semester, but I’d like the bulk of my efforts in dance this year to go into more fully investing myself into the idea of dancing with a deeper sense of purpose and intentionality with the stories I choose to portray.

I’ve noticed that I tend to become disillusioned with dance groups at Berkeley that favor crowd pleasing choreo, lots of heavy bass, and an excess of sass and character (see; reasons why Joseph quit going to IDX workshops this summer).

But AFX Kelix. [M]ovement GQ. Abba Modern Spring ‘14.

With the exception of AFX Exhibition this summer (just because it was the first competitive dance team I got into), I think that these have really been the groups that will stay with me as the most enriching and rewarding teams I have ever been on because of the equal depth of vision and planning that seemed to go into the message of the set, and not necessarily just the moves or the blocking.

Just some self-addressed food for thought on a 3am morning.

“For if I put the question to anyone whether he prefers to find joy in the truth or in falsehood, he does not hesitate to say that he prefers the truth, just as he does not hesitate that he wants to be happy. The happy life is joy based on the truth… This happy life everyone desires; joy in the truth everyone wants. I have met with many people who wished to deceive, none who wished to be deceived. How then did they know about this happy life unless in the same way that they knew about the truth? They love the truth because they have no wish to be deceived, and when they love the happy life, they are unquestionably loving the truth. And they would have no love for it unless there were some knowledge of it in their memory. Why then do they not find their joy in this? Why are they not happy? It is because they are more occupied in other things which make them more wretched than their tenuous consciousness of the truth makes them happy. For among humanity there is ‘still a little light.’ May they walk, may they indeed walk, ‘so that the darkness does not capture them’ (John 12:35).
But why is it that ‘truth engenders hatred?’ Why does your man who preaches what is true become to them an enemy when they love the happy life which is simply joy grounded on truth? The answer must be this: their love for truth takes the form that they love something else and want this object of their love to be the truth; and because they do not wish to be deceived, they do not wish to be persuaded that they are mistaken. And so they hate the truth for the sake of the object which they love instead of the truth. They love truth for the light it sheds, but hate it when it shows them up as being wrong… Yet even thus, in its miserable condition, it prefers to find joy in true rather than in false things. It will be happy if it comes to find joy in that truth by which all things are true— without any distraction interfering.”

—   St. Augustine, Confessions (via darkenedanddazzled)


Sometimes, I feel strange because I want to know everything about everyone. I never get tired of analyzing other people and learning what makes them tick. I don’t want to use what I learn to hurt anyone. I just think the characteristics that make people uniquely them are so wonderful and so valuable. Not everyone is appreciated in the way they deserve, and I wish I could appreciate everyone’s individual idiosyncrasies to let them know that someone notices and cares.

Just experienced an earthquake of 6.0 magnitude over here in the bay, and though I acknowledge the effectiveness of things like Facebook to check up on everybody and cross check our scary experiences with those of others - there’s something that feels really strange about the instant impulse to race towards the nearest smartphone to update your status before anybody else in the cleverest way possible.

Though I’ve lived here all my life and have gotten my fair share of quakes, I’ve come to fear these things as an uncanny mimicry of the unpredictable timing of disaster and death that can come to hit you, whether or not you’re in a state of grace.

That terrifies me, man.

Yet by somehow buying into the pressure of wanting to fit in and make a joke and confirm that I’m like everybody else by updating a status, I try to hide from the reality that these things do make me reflect on how lax and complacent I can be in spiritual matters. How unready I would be if I had to face my Master now. How broken I would feel if I knew of the eternity I’d lose without my parents or my family or my God.

These are things I don’t really think about often because I tend to take my comfort and safety for granted - but moments like these help me realize why it would be better to confront these fears much earlier rather than later.

“To build up a library is to create a life. It’s never just a random collection of books.”

—   Carlos María Domínguez (via simplybookdrunk)

(Source: observando, via avereginapacis)

May Your love penetrate my woundedness.


The pride in his eyes in that last cap

(Source: heyyyybrother, via perks-of-being-chinese)




i guess i recorded an ice bucket challenge today after i got my wisdom teeth out ??

"I’M BLEEDING….. that’s okay i can still do it"


(via catchdatrychu)